I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
