I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize