I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize