We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
