Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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