Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
