she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize