why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
