Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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