So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Randomize
