I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Randomize
