Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize