16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Just took my morning after pill in the library
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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