Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
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