the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Randomize
