There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
