She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize
