her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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