omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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