Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
