is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
They took my balls.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
