just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
