i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
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