Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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