You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
