So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
