Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize