I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
