escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Randomize