Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
