he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
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