Your favorite bartender is back from prision
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Dick very happy bro
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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