yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
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