just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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