he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
