i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize