You're completely useless in the revolution.
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize
