we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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