I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Randomize