I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize