we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
