is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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