porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
barbara walters just said penis...
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
We need to get me chipped asap
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Randomize
