Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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