Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Dear god my vagina.
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