Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Randomize
