Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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