So drunk, too bad you don't want this
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
The feeling are messing with the penis
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
