I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
