I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
