I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
